We are attachment
parents. We use the tools provided by AP. Or not. There is no rule how to be an
attachment parent. Everybody has their own path to bond with their children. Every
family has their own way to experience parenting. We respect that.
We follow principles.
These are:
Prepare for Pregnancy, Birth, and Parenting
Become emotionally and
physically prepared for pregnancy and birth. Research available options for
healthcare providers and birthing environments, and become informed about
routine newborn care. Continuously educate yourself about developmental stages
of childhood, setting realistic expectations and remaining flexible.
Feed with Love and Respect
Breastfeeding is the
optimal way to satisfy an infant's nutritional and emotional needs.
"Bottle Nursing" adapts breastfeeding behaviors to bottle-feeding to
help initiate a secure attachment. Follow the feeding cues for both infants and
children, encouraging them to eat when they are hungry and stop when they are
full. Offer healthy food choices and model healthy eating behavior.
Respond with Sensitivity
Build the foundation of
trust and empathy beginning in infancy. Tune in to what your child is
communicating to you, then respond consistently and appropriately. Babies
cannot be expected to self-soothe, they need calm, loving, empathetic parents
to help them learn to regulate their emotions. Respond sensitively to a child
who is hurting or expressing strong emotion, and share in their joy.
Use Nurturing Touch
Touch meets a baby's
needs for physical contact, affection, security, stimulation, and movement.
Skin-to-skin contact is especially effective, such as during breastfeeding,
bathing, or massage. Carrying or babywearing also meets this need while on the
go. Hugs, snuggling, back rubs, massage, and physical play help meet this need
in older children.
Ensure Safe Sleep, Physically and Emotionally
Babies and children have
needs at night just as they do during the day; from hunger, loneliness, and
fear, to feeling too hot or too cold. They rely on parents to soothe them and
help them regulate their intense emotions. Sleep training techniques can have
detrimental physiological and psychological effects. Safe co-sleeping has
benefits to both babies and parents.
Provide Consistent and Loving Care
Babies and young children
have an intense need for the physical presence of a consistent, loving,
responsive caregiver: ideally a parent. If it becomes necessary, choose an
alternate caregiver who has formed a bond with the child and who cares for him
in a way that strengthens the attachment relationship. Keep schedules flexible,
and minimize stress and fear during short separations.
Practice Positive Discipline
Positive discipline helps
a child develop a conscience guided by his own internal discipline and
compassion for others. Discipline that is empathetic, loving, and respectful
strengthens the connection between parent and child. Rather than reacting to
behavior, discover the needs leading to the behavior. Communicate and craft
solutions together while keeping everyone's dignity intact.
Strive for Balance in Your Personal and Family
Life
It is easier to be
emotionally responsive when you feel in balance. Create a support network, set
realistic goals, put people before things, and don't be afraid to say
"no". Recognize individual needs within the family and meet them to
the greatest extent possible without compromising your physical and emotional
health. Be creative, have fun with parenting, and take time to care for
yourself.
See more at: http://www.attachmentparenting.org/principles/principles.php
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